Wednesday, August 16, 2006

A Woeful Tale

I've had a suggestion from Tin Man (a friend of mine) to blog about my laptop being on the fritz. I'd mentioned this briefly in a post a few days ago. So, in an effort to inject some lightheartedness into my world, I will do just that. Now, for your reading pleasure, is the tale of extreme stupidity....and it's all true.

The Laptop
(a tragedy)

Once upon a time, fair maiden Grace sat down at her computer, as she was oft apt to do. Upon supplying her maidenly password in an effort to check her maidenly email, she discovered that the maidenly "z" key was quite sticky. "Alas," she said to herself, "my z key seems to be sticking." Undaunted and determined, fair Grace proceeded to investigate the stickiness of the key. After much fiddling and fumbling with said key, fair Grace became more and more disturbed and challenged until the very existence of said "z" key was almost more than one as fair as she could bear. In what can only be described as the sort of determination generally attributed to triatheletes, Civil War heroes, or vacuum cleaner salespersons, our perky little heroin popped the "z" key completely free of it's once secure position on the keyboard. "Oopsy," Grace exclaimed. And then, gasping at the sight, "Ewwww!" For there, atop and around the soft rubbery nodule protruding now in the place where the "z" key once was, appeared a pea-sized dust bunny. Being a maiden as fair as she, Grace was quite appalled at the width and breadth of the dust bunny. She could quite easily grasp it between finger and thumb, remove it, and dispose of it. And that she did, quite to her pleasure. Cleanliness is, after all, next to Godliness; or so it's been said. Having never expected such a sight upon removal of the key, fair Grace was naturally curious as to what might lie beneath the other keys. And so, with wreckless abandonment, like a tornado in a trailer park, Grace proceeded to pop other keys from their positions. Finding and disposing of one dust bunny after another. Grace was approximately 14 keys into her cleaning frenzy when suddenly, and without warning, her sense of reason and sanity returned as clearly as if a voice had spoken aloud, "what about putting the keys back ON?" Grace immediately changed her course of action from popping off to popping on, finding the latter to be somewhat trickier than the former. When all was said and done, our poor defeated Grace had rightfully returned 4 keys to their proper positions, 1 key to an improper position, and had 9 keys left homeless; the tiny metal pieces they should clip to having been snapped completely away in her foiled attempts at returning them to their home. And, the "z" key, or rather, the rubber nub that was once a "z" key, was STILL sticking!
The moral of the story: Don't ever take the keys off your laptop, no matter how big, fat, furry, and disgusting the dust bunnies may seem!
Hopefully, my laptop will return soon. It's at technology and I'm pretty sure they're in no hurry to return it to me. *big sigh*
Keep praying for me!
love,
grace

8 comments:

em said...

You make it sound so dainty. I'm sure it was more like WWF smackdown love to the poor laptop. hehehehe! IT departments are never eager to get a job done. I know -- I've worked with dozens. ;-)

I'm praying for you!

grace said...

Thanks Em! It MIGHT have been like you're saying. ;)

grace

Inheritor of Heaven said...

Very well written story (and I agree with Em above, it did sound a bit more dainty than real life probably happened.) Too bad it is not one of those "happy ending stories" our kids used to like. Although it isn't technically over yet is it? You are a braver sort than I. If it was a school computer I call tech first and usually (twice now) they say, "We'll bring you down another, your hard drive is fried." I also had one stolen from my classroom over the summer. 3 computers in about 5 years, pretty good average huh?

Jay said...

Poor laptop. I just got one for college. Hopefully nothing bad will happen, because I know nothing, I mean nothing, about how to fix a computer. Heck, I can barely use it. It's a miracle I got my blog up and running.

Wishing all the best,
Jay

grace said...

INHERITOR: You must have a "graceful" wife like me at your house! hee hee! ;) I've managed, somehow, to maintain a somewhat favored and unique status with our tech dept. up until now....we'll see. Hopefully I'll have my baby (laptop) back soon! I miss him....and have wondered why I never named him...the way guys name their cars! haha!

Jay: You are just so cute I want to pinch your cheeks and hug you till you can hardly breathe!

love,
grace

George said...

Grace, I have read your comments on "featheriron's" site. Carol and I have been friends for over a decade. After reading some of you posts I have a question - hope it does not sound to ignorant - could you tell me what SSA stands for? I work in the medical industry and do not recall this one. Drop me a line if you get a chance. George.

Jay said...

Whoa Grace, you sounded a little weird there in that last comment. You're not trying to scare me away from your blog, are you ;)

(Oh, and George, SSA stands for same-sex attraction)

Robert said...

Gadzzokz, zoze zee keyz can cauz zo many troublz for zomething that iz not uzed zat often in zentencez.