I've been advising a friend a bit about his decision to date someone seriously. Seriously enough that he wants to share his struggle with her. I'd share some of the more humorous aspects of our conversations but they probably wouldn't sound funny in print. I do believe that the blessing of humor is one of God's most wonderful acts of grace that He's bestowed upon us. Almost makes me want to tear up and cry...it's so awesome. How ironic is that?
Anyway, back to my point. Within these conversations we've talked a great deal about submission to one another within God's kingdom and how being transparent and honest about our struggles is one of the keys to living an overcoming, virtuous, Christ-centered life. When I undergird this particular struggle with the belief that it is nothing more than a sort of "twist" that's been crafted by the dark side to yet again screw up God's original intent/design for our well-being (which is all that ANY sin is, really) then, like any other sin, one of the keys is in getting it out of the dark places and into the glorious light of Christ. That's only done by sharing it with others. And yet, for guys like my friend, and Tdub, this involves a huge amount of risk, moreso than your more "garden-variety" sins.
My friend keeps saying "poor girl, I feel so sorry for her." He says this because he knows he's about to face her with something that has the potential to "whither her desires into nothingness". He will not be able to honestly tell her that he will never struggle sexually in this way. No more than any truly honest always-hetero man could say the same to his potential wife about his sexual desires. She will be faced with the fact that she is setting herself up to fall in love with a man who is broken and will more than likely never be entirely whole. Barring some miracle, or the resurrection, there are chinks and cracks. And for me, herein lies a blessing. This struggle blesses me by keeping me and my husband wholly dependent on Christ for our goodness. You see, I've learned that I am not ONE iota better off than he is as I face down my own demons and struggles. We, left to our own devices, have done horrible, rotten, unspeakable things to one another. Furthermore, I can say with certainty that if we didn't keep our focus on Christ, we'd probably repeat most of it. The children of Israel seem so stupid in those stories when they keep turning away from God again and again, and yet, I do the exact same thing if I don't SUBMIT to Him daily. That's why he says this.
Submission is difficult, particularly in the beginning of it. But whoa....once you persevere through a valley or two or eighteen (ha!) it actually becomes pleasant to submit. It totally takes the heat (literally and figuratively) off of ME and allows me to live in a freedom and peace of mind that defies comprehension. If I'm not really in charge of anything, then I can't screw up, can I? It's beautiful. I'm not saying I've arrived....no, no. If I ever DO say such a thing it would mean I had become very far from God indeed! But I am saying that my walk with Christ has begun to become less awkward.
And all because of sin. Hmmm.
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