Monday, July 21, 2008

Dating (again)

Ok. I suck at this dating thing. Really. My problem is my transparency. I think. Who the heck really knows?

I think I'm overwhelming to the sort of man to which I'm attracted.

Also, I have a problem with self-control. I admit it. Just take that for whatever you want to take it can't be much worse than my reality.

I also think I'm a bit weird. And so, that means that I don't match with a lot of "normal" people.

You are probably wondering....what happened???? I thought you'd met this great guy and you were sure he was someone with whom you wanted to have a serious relationship? Yeah...I did....and he was. But, as fate would have it....he's not sure about things which basically means a big fat NO in datespeak. Datespeak, you like this.......anything less than "i'm crazy about you" means "oh my god, get away from me you loser" Well, maybe not quite's better to be on the safe side in these situations so you don't end up looking more like a complete idiot than you already do after you've made a total idiot of yourself.

It's weird, though. I'm not like all completely devastated or anything. I mean, I know what I felt...and I know there was a connection....and it IS mostly just puzzling just like I thought it would be in the beginning if it didn't work out. I'm hoping that we'll remain friends because I really did like his dogs.

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1 comment:

Iain said...

Aww! I sooo feel for you!

Oh dear! I can remember I also sucked at dating, so hopefully this anecdote will bring a smile back to your face.

I was a slow starter with girls, but there was this cute Dutch girl in our youth group who was going out with my best friend from school. Then he dumped her for someone else & she was devastated. Then she started getting quite friendly with me! I was so inexperienced that I took it as genuine interest, rather than a demonstrative way of getting back at her ex.

So I asked her out on a date & she accepted. We went to an exhibition in London & on the way home I thought this would be the chance to make a cautious declaration of interest. So I discretely (I thought) slipped my arm round her waist...

Well, I don't know if perhaps I was so inexperienced that on this rather short girl my hand ended up further up than was appropriate, but her response was absolutely immediate and what I'd call the definitive Big Fat No:

"Take your hands off me you dirty beast!!"

It kind of put the mockers on the rest of the date.

Fear of similar rejection set me back in the dating game for a couple of years. When I first kissed a girl full on, I was literally shaking from head to foot (even though she had made some pretty clear signals). By delicious irony at the time we were listening to Handel's Messiah on my music system. It was during "All we like sheep have gone astray"!

God definitely has a sense of humour, don't you think?